Inner Hag leads to Outer Hag! 3 ways to re-program her!

I know, I know, I talk a lot about the Hag in the Attic, but she is what she is. A hag nagging at your brain. She is the head of the inner critic department and no one is replacing HER! No one!

I am a huge supporter of women’s voices whether that is speaking publicly or privately through writing. No matter what their voice sounds like or what form it takes, I support them😊. I also believe what goes in must come out, or what is inside of us must come out. So, if your inner voice is negative, it will come out onto others, correct?

I’d never want to talk to others the way I talk to myself, but when you’re carrying this voice around for years, it does come out, whether we like it or not.

Here is a scenario:

Public speaking is the number one fear next to death, so guess what the Hag is doing? Playing on this fear to keep you small. You’ll have heard her voice.  Stand up and speak? Why? Everyone is just going to make fun of you. What do you have to say?

Fear

Does that sound familiar? Are you getting the picture here? When we experience dialogue like this (we all do) fear increases, anxiety kicks in, your stomach churns, your palms sweat, and before you know it, we stop supporting ourselves. Then we leave opportunities on the table, which is one of the worse things we could do to ourselves and to others.

The conversations you have with yourself have a direct impact on how you feel and how you behave. If your self-talk is filled with doubt, harsh criticism, and catastrophic predictions, you’ll struggle to achieve your goals. You will struggle to empower yourself, which in turn will lead you to walk away unfulfilled from situations.

Here are three ways to overcome the Hag and move forward:

  1. Reframe your words. Instead of saying “I’m an idiot,” or “this won’t work,” say “there is a chance this may not work out. However, there is a better chance that it will succeed! I am smart, I am worthy, and I do know what I am doing!”
  2. Prove your hag wrong! When she says you won’t lose 10 pounds, or you won’t get that customer, prove her wrong. Go do something small to overcome her doubt. Look at it as a small, doable challenge. Remember small things lead to giant accomplishments, take one step at a time.
  3. Remember, you do not want the Hag to go away. You need her; she is the leader of your emotional team. She just wants boundaries, direction, and a job—not the one she has had with your headspace. She just needs retraining and leadership from YOU.

We cannot control these thoughts; however, we can manage, lead, guide and turn her into our support system. Then self-defeating thoughts will lessen. Your true, inspiring, uplifting thoughts will begin to surface. This is the place where our confidence grows, the place of our true, authentic, soulful selves.

Peace & Love,

Kim

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